CHARACTER


What exactly is character?

There are some misconceptions about the real meaning and implication of the concept of character.

Let’s go straight to the point…

Some people think character means not drinking any form of alcohol or not smoking any cigars.

While this may be very good and beneficial to the health, it is really not an ethical or moral matter.

People don’t understand character means not telling lies, not deceiving people, not cheating, not pretending, not scamming, and not swindling.

Positively, it means qualities such as integrity, honesty, accountability, loyalty, faithfulness, truthfulness, trustworthiness, etc.

Let’s take it a step further…

According to Scripture, Christian character includes the pursuit of truth, godliness, righteousness, love, joy, peace, equity, gentleness, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, patience, perseverance, meekness, humility, self-control, compassion, thankfulness, forgiveness, contentment, and unity.

Let’s make a distinction between character and personality, although they are sometimes used interchangeably.

Character is a person's moral and ethical qualities. It includes the beliefs and moral principles that can guide one’s behavior in discrete ways. 

Personality is the totality of a person's physical, psychological, emotional, and social complexities that are manifested through behavior and actions.

Temperament and character are part of personality.

To put it simply: 

Temperament means innate behavioral tendencies.

Character means moral and ethical qualities.

Personality encompasses both or is a combination of both but includes learned traits and experiences.

How do you know a person’s character?

It takes time to know a person’s true character.

Some studies state that it takes about 3 months to find out everything bad or wrong about a person, or to figure out basic character traits, core behaviors and overall personality of an individual.

Notice the implication from the above statement that the true mark of a person's character is not how they act when things are going well; but it is how they act when things are not going well.

True character is more accurately revealed through consistent patterns rather than isolated actions. 

For example, a person who consistently acts with kindness, honesty, and reliability is likely reflecting their true character.

What key character traits should you cultivate as a person as well as look for in a potential partner?

Being empathetic, being caring, being socially careful or conscious or conscientious, following the rules, being loving, being open, being trustworthy, being passionate, being compassionate, etc.

These all signal that you are becoming the optimal version of yourself and the person who hones and exhibits same is somebody you would like to know.

Finally, to develop your character, focus on the following: self-reflection, practicing self-discipline, embracing challenges, and cultivating virtues like honesty, integrity, and empathy.

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