IN COMPANY OF MISERY: CHOICES AND CYCLES
It's official: some people may
not really be happy to see you happy.
This does not necessarily mean that they
are bad people or that they will do anything to hurt you intentionally. No, but
they may have gone through a lot of painful experiences in their lives and are
carrying deep-seated pain that they find succor and comfort in company of
someone else who has experienced a similar type of pain or is experiencing some
sort of unpleasant situation in their lives too. As the saying goes, misery loves company.
So, the thought of seeing you
happy or having an experience they haven't had or that they think they won't
have naturally leaves them drained, insecure and even more miserable. They
inwardly literally panic at the thought of that.
That's their initial response:
fear that results in more pain and misery. Thus, their brain and emotions go
into sabotage mode to fault and foil whatever awesome plans you may have
proposed or whatever new ideas you share with them.
It's a subtle psychological
trap of subconscious selfishness that close friends, family and relatives are
usually vulnerable to. It has nothing to do with them holding any malicious
intent against you. You just have to be aware of it and refuse to let it stop your own growth or happiness.
However, everyone of us must consciously unlearn negative or counterproductive selfishness which
is natural to human nature and graciously release people into their beautiful
destinies to have their own unique experiences. How do we know, maybe their own
pleasant experiences may open unexpected doors to our own pleasant
experiences. For indeed, as a universally abiding principle, what we sow is
what we also reap. What we help make happen for others, and what we wish for
others, is what we have made to happen for ourselves, and what we have wished
for ourselves.
In this way and many more ways, we make our life
experiences, rich or poor, prosperous or problematic, happy or miserable. These
become the cycles of joy or misery that we are constantly creating for
ourselves through our personal choices and in consonance with the true contents
of our hearts.
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